LOWER DECKS just make fun of STAR TREK DISCOVERY??? (editorial)

The recent announcement that CBS will be producing a new Star Trek series has been met with mixed reactions from the community. Some are excited for a fresh take on the franchise while others have expressed their disappointment in the show being set 10 years before Captain Kirk and company’s adventures.

The star trek lower decks is a blog that makes fun of the new show Star Trek Discovery. They are not funny, and they do not have any jokes.

HIS BLOG IS FULL OF SPOILERS, JONATHAN!

I couldn’t believe it when I saw it, but it was true. “Kayshon, His Eyes Open,” the second episode of season 2 of STAR TREK: LOWER DECKS, has a complete zinger at the end directed squarely at its elder sister-series, Star Trek: Discovery. But first, let me share a few ideas with you before I show you the footage (you’ll simply go to the bottom of this blog to view it anyhow, but y’all come back up now, y’hear?).

Writing these articles on the different CBS All Access…er, I mean ViacomCBS Paramount+ Star Trek shows is getting more difficult. The reason for this is because I’m not much of a reviewer… And, in any case, most people don’t care what I or other critics think about the episodes. It’s not that we don’t have fascinating ideas to offer; it’s simply that people either agree with us and want confirmation that someone else thinks the same way they do, or they disagree with us and want to fight and tell us how wrong we are. During a Vulcan wedding ceremony these days, critics may as well scream “Kal-if-fee!” or “All Klingons are wussies!” at an Ascension Ritual.

Humor.

It’s not that Star Trek can’t be amusing at times. Since Captain Kirk was buried beneath an avalanche of dead tribbles and Spocko said, “I’d urge ya’s ta keep dialin’, Oxmyx,” Trek has proven its ability to be amusing. Star Trek IV’s most quotable quotes include: (“Well, a double-dumbass on you!”) The Return (“Well, a double-dumbass on you!”) “I like Italian cuisine, and so do you…” “Hello, computer…” says the narrator. “No, I’m from Iowa, and I exclusively work in space…” The funniest ones were “Ve are searching for nuclear wessels…” and “Ve are seeking for nuclear wessels…” For the love of God, Data learned comedy from Joe Piscopo, and a whole episode of DS9 might have been named “The Bad News Niners.” Let’s not even begin to discuss Dr. Chaotica!

Lower Decks, on the other hand, is a unique experience. It goes across a dividing line.

Is that the case…?

“Is LOWER DECKS the RORSCHACH TEST of Star Trek?” was the initial title (and subject) of this blog. If you’re unfamiliar (or just vaguely acquainted) with the idea of a Rorschach test, it’s a tool used by psychologists and psychiatrists to assess personality characteristics and cognitive functioning in their patients (among many other things). The patient is given a series of ink blots that are basically random in form (although usually symmetrical) and asked to tell the tester what they perceive when they look at them. The patient’s remarks, inquiries, and even their movement and behavior while looking at the cards are all recorded and evaluated afterwards.

In a Rorschach test, there is no such thing as a right or wrong response. Because the ink blots aren’t intended to appear like anything in particular, responses like “butterfly,” “devil face,” and “woman’s hoo-hah” are all equally acceptable. The process of examining and debating the cards reveals a lot about the individual who is looking at the pictures to the evaluator. Even how you respond to the fact that I just typed “woman’s hoo-hah” may reveal a lot about you…and me for using the word “hoo-hah.”

But I’m getting off track…

In other ways, however, I don’t really digress since, like Rorschach tests (and hoo-hahs! ), how a fan responds to Lower Decks may reveal more about the fan than the TV show. Again, there isn’t a clear “correct” or “wrong” response. Not everyone finds the same things amusing, and not every Star Trek fan believes the same things about the franchise.

Take, for example, my long-time pal Jack “Towaway” Eaton. (And if you want to know why he’s known as “Towaway,” you’ll have to ask GEORGE TAKEI…) George is arrested for running in Maine, which is a lengthy but funny tale.) Anyway, when the first episode of the second season, “Strange Energies,” aired, Jack wrote the following on Facebook (there’s more, but this is the most important bit)…

As a result, they’re making no apologies for how the present producers and showrunners of the Star Trek series see their audience: lemmings. On this week’s episode of “The Ready Room,” more than one member of the cast and the showrunner made multiple references to how much the fans will love the callbacks to Trek history (I hope Wil Wheaton is dragging home big bags of money for his performance as a used car salesman where every car on the lot runs like a Ferrari regardless of what it looks like). They are incorrectly referred to as “Easter eggs,” although they are really fan service. They’re betting that long-time fans will be so engrossed in the nerdgasm of hearing “Eminiar 7” that they won’t realize how poorly the narrative was written. The episode of “Lower Decks” this week is one of their worst. A “story” is thrown together around a reference to “Where No Man Has Gone Before.” The play is billed as a comedy, but I kept expecting the laughs to arrive, but they never came. I’m hoping “Strange New Worlds” will be enjoyable rather than an Alzheimer’s test of Trek fans’ memories.

Now, the first episode of season two was really enjoyable for me. And, although I only laughed once or twice, I was smiling the most of the time. It was a good tale, definitely better than “Spock’s Brain,” “The Royale,” or “Threshold” (the one where Janeway and Paris devolve into giant iguanas and then mate). But, hey, I’m putting a very low bar there. I’d argue the first Lower Decks of this season were on par with the best episodes of the first seasons of Star Trek: The Next Generation and Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. And did I appreciate Gary Mitchell’s transformation into a godlike being? Absolutely! I like fan service because I am a fan who enjoys being served. (Wait, it didn’t come out quite properly… particularly because Jack’s next words were “nerdgasm.”

But really, I’m glad to see that kind of thing. Jack, on the other hand, does not seem to be. However, there is no right or incorrect response. In fact, as much as most people seem to like The Orville, opinions are divided on whether or not there should be so much blatant comedy…or, at the very least, whether or not jokes involving anatomy and bodily fluids should be toned down a bit. On the other hand, some individuals are perfectly content with everything. “C’est la vie,” as we say on Earth.

So I was all set to write on Jack’s remark and the Rorschach test in general. Then I finally got around to viewing the season’s SECOND episode. If you haven’t seen it yet, why are you reading this spoiler-filled blog? , the main premise is that a collector—much like Kevas Fajo from Star Trek: The Next Generation‘s “The Most Toys”—has recently died, and the crew of the USS Cerritos is needed to assist catalog his collection before it is auctioned off…because some of the items are, y’know, hazardous. Of course, this collection covers the length and breadth among Star Trek‘s various series, much like the most obsessive of us Trek fans with our own collections!

If Towaway thought the first episode was packed with fan service—Holy Rings of Betazed, Batman!!!—this episode was jam-packed with easter eggs. (Okay, that was a terribly incorrect metaphor, but picture something packed with an unwieldy number of easter eggs for yourself.) People, please assist a blogger!) Everything from the U.S.S. Valiant‘s ship’s recorder from “Where No Man Has Gone Before” to a Vulcan lirpa to Khan’s broken belt-buckle necklace to the alien “game” headset that disabled the Enterprise-D crew to a giant skeleton of Spock Two from the animated TOS episode “The Infinite Vulcan” appears in the episode.

We also have the Pakleds, a Miranda-class vessel, Cardassians flashing four lights on a Starfleet prisoner, and numerous allusions to Will Riker’s transporter clone, Thomas. And what about one of the Titan’s shuttlecraft? The legendary John Coltrane… Will Riker, a jazz trombonist, would almost definitely want one of his shuttles named after John Coltrane, one of the finest American jazz saxophonists of all time. (Assume it’s Louis, not Neil, if we ever see the shuttle Armstrong on Titan.)

Anyway, “nergasm” is an understatement when it comes to this episode’s fan service! It’s almost as if the authors went ahead in time, read Towaway’s remark, then went back in time and created the episode just to confuse him!

Okay, now that you’ve read thus far, it’s time for me to give you the clickbait that drew you in the first place: how did Lower Decks dis Discovery? (Can we just enjoy what I did there for a millisecond?) In any case, here it is…